Monday, October 20, 2008


I'm not speaking pirate... I'm MAD!!!

So I mentioned I went to some cake classes.

I took pictures of my projects yesterday, but they weren't very good, so I took more today. I started with the bride and groom. Here they are:

Not bad, no?
My other project, called, "Dad & Me," was okay, too. Not perfect, by any stretch, but okay. Let's just say I wouldn't be embarrassed to give it to someone.

Let me be clear. It was okay. As in, not anymore.

Wednesday night when I got home I put it under a cake dome to keep it safe/clean, until I was ready to place it on a cake (and that was the plan), and set it up on top of a cabinet so nobody would knock it over.
I got it down to take pictures just minutes ago, and this is what I found:

The chair has split open in three places, the little girl is now doing a back-bend over her dad's arm, which has caused her leg to crack (almost break off completely), his arm couldn't handle her acrobatics and cracked, and his crotch cracked. Thankfully he's made of sugar, so nothing inappropriate is visible. It is a pile of sugar good only for the trash. Which is a shame. I really worked hard, and thought it looked pretty good.

He has no idea the pain he has inflicted on my soul. He just sits there. Smiling like the moron he is.

And this little wench? Don't even get me started on her. I think this whole thing is her fault.

Can I just say?

I won't be paying them any final respects when I throw their treacherous little sugar bodies in the trash.


Erin said...

O u poor thing! They do look good though!

Anonymous said...

I think that they look maaaaaarrrrvelous honey! Keep up the great work! Love, your S.I.L.

Lisa said...

LOL I'm just a laughing over here...I'm sorry. But all I read was "This little wench..." lol

Poor little girl...give her a BREAK! ;-) (no pun intended! :-) )

Sometimes you just gotta laugh. You really did do such a good job on this stuff too. ((((Tracye)))

Anonymous said...

Next time give the dad boxers...just in case!


Melanie said...

Hey, those things are 50 bajillion times better than anything I could ever make. I loved the cracked crotch--who doesn't love porn fondant men? I'm all about them and dream about them. Show your fondant stuff little man!!

Huse Yo Mama said...

Oh my gosh, that would have been a perfect cake topper for my family...considering the girl is falling off the daddy's broken arm - daily occurrence at our house. The split in the crotch would just be an added funny. So, go ahead and send the cake my way - we'll eat it. See - no sugar wasted!!!!!

You did a great job!!!

Anonymous said...

You have some anger issues you need to deal with. The little girl can't help it that she eats too much. Dad's just trying to be a good daddy, visiting with his little girl sitting on his lap. The split crotch thing....that's inappropriate to say the least. Your site has probably already been flagged & is being monitored.
Porn fondant?? I thought I was a perv. I look like a cub scout compared to that.
All seriousness aside, you are extemely talented, although forgetful about the climate in which you live. Your talent & attention to detail is amazing.
As well as having the patience of Job to work on something so small.
Do you realize that people eat it? And what happens several hours after they eat it? That alone would discourage me from doing it. Which brings us to another quality you posess that mom & dad decided to exclude from my DNA. AMBITION!!!
I get a hairy back & you get talent, patience & ambition...OOOOHH BOY!!!! I knew I was their favorite!!!
Don't be so hard on yourself, it looks wonderful.
love you,

Tracye said...

Don't forget two other things you got that I didn't:

1. Your dad's pervy perverson sense of humor

2. A receding hairline

:) You know I love you!

And thanks, EVERYONE, for your compliments and encouragement!